Just wasn’t a good day today

Words just can not describe my day, you would think it could not of gotten any worse, but it did.  It was such an upsetting day that I just had to go and lay down and I just fell apart emotionally.  A person can only take so much.  If I was to describe how I felt its like a rubber band that has been stretched and just a little more, its going to snap!  That is how I feel.  But I am a tough cookie so I just push along.  Dad, well something definitely is up with him, now he is really being hush hush about, and he didn’t go for his drive this evening.  Now this may not sound very alarming to the average person visiting my blog, but we are talking about the man I can not get to stay home come hell or high water, even when I know he is sick and he says no I am going.  So something is hurting him but he isn’t going to tell me.  I know he is waking up at 4 which his body thinks is 5.  I know the time change is hard on him this time of year, but usually by now its better.  But I suspect its something more.  Only because he is acting different.  I called his RA doctor and she sees him next week.  I will see how it goes between now and then and maybe leave a message for them on their machine and see if she can get anything out of him but I suspect he would not tell her too.

Of course I think the stress from the situation that was going on between my daughter and I today probably doesn’t help, I know he heard.  Naturally he doesn’t know what happen after he left and I am not going to tell him.  Just not a need for him to know.

So I think I will head to bed as soon as I can tonight, pending on how late dad stays up sleeping in his chair.