An emotional prep of a meal!

December 2, 2008

Today I made a pot roast with potatoes and carrots for dinner. Now you may wonder why this would of been an emotion prep or emotional themed meal for me, but if you remember back to a month ago when my father was in the hospital what was the food item that lodged in his throat (on the growth)? Pot roast. Every day I was there with my dad when he was in, any time a new nurse was assigned to him, they would ask me, so are you the one who cooked the pot roast. I came home feeling like crap let me tell you, and cried many tears. I haven’t made one since then, until today. I was very nervous serving him dinner. I really was. I wish I could explain it more but I can’t. The meal turned out wonderful, I even took a picture (yes I know that sounds lame). I know it wasn’t my cooking or what I served my dad that made him choke then, it was what he had going on. My hubby hinted a few times about a roast for dinner the past few weeks and when I would go meat shopping I would look at them, but would not buy one! This was the longest I ever gone making a pot roast!!

I looked over at my dads plate and seen all the meat I gave him was gone and said hey did you give all that to hubby, he laughed, and said “HELL NO! I ate it all!!” He has seconds on the potatoes and carrots!! It was all good, but I worried. If he would of even had a tickle in his throat I would of literally taken my roasting pan and tossed it through the window!!!

Posted by Suzie Q | Filed Under Lifesavers

I never ask for a list

December 2, 2008

My hubby cracks me up. Every year I have to sit down to make him a list of Christmas gift idea’s for me, and never once in the 10 1/2 years we have been together have I ever asked for a list. Personally I think he is pretty easy to buy for, but he thinks the opposite. Without giving away what I got him, in case he snoops the blog, I got him some sports gifts, some clothing items, a few collectibles and a few things that may go with a few bags of popped popcorn! It is so hard for me to literally sit down and write out a list of what I want. I am always the last person I think about when it comes to gifts honestly. I love to give gifts to others, I love it, I think of have a knack for it sometimes. Yes I do spoil myself with certain things like my soaps and lotions, candles and tarts, but for me those last two things are a staple household item so I don’t consider that a just for me item!! Come to think of it my hubby uses the other stuff too once in a while! I can tell you this much, I don’t consider a new frying pan that someone is going to fry bacon in for breakfast a gift for me to put under the tree!!! Now I have to put my thinking cap on!

Posted by Suzie Q | Filed Under Lifesavers

I don’t know what to say to him

December 2, 2008

I don’t know what to say to my hubby regarding my dad. My dad has changed tremendously. He is very mean right now. More so than before. The way he talks to my son is more than I can take some days before, and now it seems worse. I don’t think it helps matters when my son is giving me attitude in front of him. But my dad is more “demanding” than before. Usually was just with me, now it more with my son and now he has said some things to my hubby that pissed him off. I was down the hall last night and I guess dad was done playing on the laptop and said to hubby you gonna roll that cord up and my hubby said excuse me and said point you gonna roll that cord up (this is cord to the laptop) hubby said NO but my son would do it (he was getting up). Now he did tell me dad the night or two before he would unplug for him so he didn’t have to bend down, but he didn’t say he put it away for him. I guess before that a commerical came on (must of been in the tub taking my bath) and my dad (at my son) demanded he get him ice cream. He doesn’t “ask”. He doesn’t say please or thank you. What am I suppose to do??

I know my son gets frustrated and I appreciate the little things he will do when I happen to be out of the room or if he helps fix a lunch or something. I reward him somehow, I say thank you for doing this or that, and explain how my dad isn’t my dad right now he doesn’t feel well and not to take it to heart and my son will say I know mom and walk away! Hubby comes to me complaining, what am I suppose to say to him? What am I suppose to do?

I know deep inside my dad doesn’t do what he does, on purpose you know? Manners they been gone since his drinking years. Just like now I just heard him say to my son do you want to make me some toast. I think its his pain medication. At 5 (dinner time) he is take TWO Vicodins for pain, that has to play a huge part I just know it.

So I cried myself to sleep last night. I don’t know how to change it? I am going to talk to my son again. My dad has a “routine” time wise. Maybe if we get the ice cream dished up before he even asks you know, something. Change my routine for when I take my baths. Let me tell you my bath time is something I treasure. Most it just something you have to do because your dirty but its the ONLY ME, ALONE time I have and I really…really need it!!!

Posted by Suzie Q | Filed Under Lifesavers